We left the hospital on Tuesday afternoon and had an uneventful night. Jeff went back to work on Wednesday and I made plans to go out to Jeff's parents house starting Friday to spend the weekend with them. Jeff was going to be involved in a church event that would last all weekend and when he is gone that much the kids get really crabby. We decided that since we haven't been to Grandma and Grandpa's in awhile this would help keep their minds off of Jeff being gone.

On Wednesday I decided to go to church, for purely selfish reasons to be honest, I was tired of being in the house. I went knowing I wasn't going to leave him but I just needed to get out. I thought he needed some out time too. I am sure he was tired of hearing me say not to do this or that.

He took it easy but was a helper for Ms. Lisa. There were some left over eggs from the Easter party so he helped open them. After that he served me "food". Around 7:30 though he began to get very clingy and complained of a headache.

On the way home he started throwing up, which we knew would happen. The doctor told us there was a good chance that he might throw up, maybe everyday and even possibly twice a day. We were still so far from home that we decided to stop by my mom's and take her car seat in case I needed it tomorrow. We stopped at a gas station and cleaned him up as much as possible. My mom was so nice to meet us outside so we could get the car seat quickly. As my mom was talking with the kids Bear's head just slipped over as he fell asleep. About twenty minutes later he woke up throwing up again. Oh, I forgot to tell you about this......Bear said he wanted to sit over there, pointing at Kati's car seat. I asked him where he wanted Kati to sit and he pointed to his own seat. As soon as we got home I began a bath for him while Jeff changed out car seats. After his bath I wrapped him in a towel and went to rock him but then he threw up again. I asked Jeff to call the Doctor from the hospital. After speaking with Doctor we called my mom and Jeff's parents and again headed back to the ER where he threw up again. I don't want to make this incredible long so I will try to shorten some of it. First let me say I was not as impressed with our second triage trip as I was our first. I felt like they thought I was an irresponsible mother and that we really came back for no reason.

Another CAT scan was done, which he did so much better with. Jeff and I were both very, very proud of him. We were told there was a little more bleeding and were admitted again. Again brought up to the 4th floor and waited while his crib was switched to a bed.

We spent the night and in the morning Dr. McDrybutIlikehimanyway came by to see me. He told me there was no more bleeding on the brain. When I said the woman last night said there was his words were "Well, she can say whatever she wants buts there wasn't any." He explained that the blood had moved or just changed shape. He let me know that he compared both scans last night and that morning and that he had also shared them with another Doctor who agreed with him.

Look at those big beautiful lips.

Jeff and I needed to run an errand so Jeff's dad came by to take care of Bear while we were gone for a couple of hours. Daddy took him down to the playroom to give him some freedom. Bear really needed that and I knew that Daddy was the perfect person for the job. He knew that Bear needed some calm kid time but wouldn't treat him like glass either.

Later that evening he threw up and began running a fever, 100.7, so we stayed another night for more observations. The fever broke in the very early hours of the morning. The doctor came by again and we talked, Bear is going to have to take it really easy. Even just a little bit of playing just wipes his body out. I can't even take him to church at this point, maybe even for five weeks. You have no idea how hard that is for my little guy. Brendon is just like his Daddy and goes stir crazy, he wants to go somewhere everyday.

So although his body is healing, here are some of the side effects or "concussive tendencies"

• headache/dizzy/lightheaded
• vomits or feels sick
• parts of body feel numb or tingle
• loses balance, drops things, trips a lot (which doesn't work well when you are trying to keep him from falling again)
• exhausted
• tires easily
• drowsy
• needs extra sleep
• hard to fall asleep
• sensitive to light and noise
• vision blurry
• ringing in ears
• confused
• in a fog
• attention or concentration is different
• difficulty with memory
• misunderstands things

and here are the toughies with Bear, because the truth is every child is different and Bear is a little crabbier than other kids but things are really intensified right now.....

• restless, irritable, or fussy
• acts without thinking
• becomes upset easily or loses temper
• sad or depressed mood
• anxious or nervous

....so one minute Bear is fine and the next minute even something slight can seem to be the end of the world to him. Not only is it tough on him it's tough on Katibug too. It's hard having all the attention on him, having to listen to the fits, etc.

Bear's got "head trauma" as grandpa says, Kati is crying, and Timbo is cutting a tooth so you can imagine how nice and calm things are around here. We would appreciate your prayers for healing, peace, and wisdom.

We want to say thank you to all who have prayed, helped, brought dinner, come to visit, and were concerned for my little man. We really appreciate it. Both our parents have especially been lifesavers threw all of this, we couldn't have done it without y'all.

On a side note, Bear got to play Xbox. The hospital had it and even though he had no idea what he was doing he had a great time pushing buttons. This beautiful smile is a great example of how part of his moods are. One minute you have this happy little guy and then mister crabby comes out. And he get soooo tired. Today he was laying in the same room that I was cleaning in and over and over I watched him lay down with a pillow and blanket then sit up for a couple of minutes to play cars and then lay back down to rest again, then sit up to play for a couple of more minutes. It was just a cycle he went threw for about an hour or more this morning.


See the cute bear in the picture? The hospital gave it to him, a "Prayer Bear". It came with a cute story. His favorite was the really colorful pillow, also in the picture. Grandpa said it was in the room when they came back from playing. An organization from the hospital made it and he just loves it.

I know none of this is flowing very well anymore but I also wanted to share some of my other thoughts.....

I enjoyed this, we were able to go to chapel where the kids praised God and were given the opportunity to talk about how they were feeling, good or bad.

Although we were/are very worried/scared we are so grateful that everything is going to be okay. Being there with all the other children who weren't going to be going home so soon was heart breaking. There are so many times that I don't understand the sovereignty of the Lord, and why things go this way or that.